A SERVICE YOU WILL REGRET TO CONTRACT

Contract “Valery” to a thorn on your side or at the side of that one person you really don´t like but don´t outright hate

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What does Valery do?

In simple terms, Valery dedicates herself at being a small nuisance to someone for a day, days, or a week!

Valery manages to accomplish all of this through various methods, from talking too much, to spamming text messages

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Valery´s methods

Teasing

Once Valery is with you or the person you contracted her to annoy, she will take upon herself to tease and make fun out of whoever is her target, making use of objectively stupid humor.

Awkward

Valery will make every situation you or the person she´s accompanying awkward by just being uncomfortably close to you.

Yapper

Valery will talk about her stupid niche interests nobody cares about constantly, until her yapping turn into incoherent babble or her throat gives up, whichever happens first.

Better in text!

Not only Valery can annoy someone in person, but also through text! especially through Discord. she will use a whole arsenal of gifs with stupid humor to spam at her victims.

Unemployed

Despite her job being a contracted nuisance, we aren´t going to give her the benefit of being called employed, and thank to this, she has an unending amount of internet drama to yap about.

Cryptid

Prepare for Valery´s various antics as the day goes by, because not only she will be annoying on purpose. she WILL be annoying while doing menial task, either procrastinating or being erratic.

How do we operate?

For this

Accountability firm

To protect ourselves and Valery from any responsibility of being charged for harassment. this contract has to be signed by the person that seeks our service, and also de person that is going to be targeted by Valery.

Schedule

Once all legal papers and consents have been signed you have to plan out the day and hours Valery will be annoying her target. we ask to any one who wishes to contract the service, to be mindful, Valery is supposed to annoy only her target, so please avoid any important dates or appointments.

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30

/ per month

  • 500GB Storage
  • Unlimited Bandwidth
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